Struggling with sleepless nights despite your best efforts? You’re not alone. Over years of working with insomnia sufferers, I’ve identified three common habits that unknowingly sabotage sleep. Let’s explore these pitfalls and how to break free from them for more restful nights.
1. Going to Bed at the Same Time Every Night
It might seem like sticking to a consistent bedtime is the secret to better sleep – it’s often one of the top things you’re recommended to do to overcome insomnia. But in reality, forcing yourself to stick to a rigid bedtime is actually the opposite of what we should be doing. It’s understandable why we do it – we want to give ourselves as much opportunity to sleep as possible. However, as you likely know, simply laying down in bed doesn’t make you fall asleep. It leaves you tossing and turning, reinforcing negative associations with your bed and being awake, and sparking anxiety which raises your body temperature and heart rate, driving you ever further from slumber.
What to Do Instead: Pay attention to your body’s signals and head to bed only when you feel genuinely sleepy. It can be difficult at first to know if you are sleepy or not, so you can always try getting into bed and then get back out if you find you aren’t able to fall asleep for a while. Spend this extra time outside your bedroom doing relaxing activities that help wind your mind down.
2. Sleeping In
Having a lay in to make up for lost sleep might feel like self-care and is incredibly tempting to do when you’re exhausted. Unfortunately, lying in only perpetuates insomnia further by disrupting your body’s internal clock. Oversleeping throws off your natural sleep-wake cycle, making it harder for your brain to know when to make you feel awake, and when to make you feel asleep. Thus leading to a dysregulated sleep pattern.
What to Do Instead: Aim to wake up and get up at the same time every day, even on weekends. By keeping your mornings consistent, you help your body reset its sleep schedule, making it easier to feel sleepy at night. This will be tough at first! But stick to it for a little while and you should notice that you feel a lot more awake in the mornings.
3. Overloading Your Day with Sleep Rituals
While creating a calming bedtime routine is helpful, obsessively following a long list of sleep tips – like perfecting the temperature of your bedroom or rigidly timing when you have your last cup of coffee for the day – can become counterproductive. This micromanagement can increase stress and make sleep feel like an unattainable goal. Not only this, but we know that these factors are not the biggest contributors to your insomnia and that managing them will not get rid of the problem. So take the pressure off of worrying about blue light, caffeine, herbal remedies, magnesium… or having a bedtime routine you have to strictly stick to.
What to Do Instead: Let go of the rituals that aren’t working and focus on what truly enhances your quality of life. Spend time with friends, get regular exercise, soak up natural daylight, and engage in activities that bring you joy. A happy, balanced day lays the foundation for better sleep at night.
A Simple Path to Better Sleep
To sum it up: go to bed when you’re sleepy, wake up at the same time every day, and free yourself from rigid sleep “rules” that don’t serve you. By focusing on these straightforward changes, you can reclaim your nights and enjoy more restful, restorative sleep.
At re:sleep, we understand that changing habits can feel daunting. Our science-backed approach is here to guide you every step of the way. Let’s work together to transform your sleep – starting tonight.
I’m exhausted when I go to bed and almost immediately fall asleep but then wake 10-20 minutes later. Once I’ve had this “nap” I’m not sleepy and take often hours to fall back asleep. Wondering what to do?
Hi there. That pattern is more common than you might think, and it can be really tough to deal with. The work we do focuses on gently retraining your sleep to be more consistent and better regulated — there’s a clear, evidence-based path forward if you ever feel ready to try it.